The 30 Before 30 List Nobody Shows You

Have you seen any of those lists of things that you should do before you're 30? Live abroad. Get a dream job. Run a marathon. Start a business. Go on a road trip. Be in a community theater production. Join a book club, and all the other things.

I'm a physician and curriculum creator, and I've done a lot of cool things in my life, but almost none of them were in my 20s. So I want to talk about what I was actually doing and give you a realistic 30 before 30.

Forget about an important appointment.

Get lost.

Lose your keys or glasses for over 24 hours.

Drive halfway down a one-way street the wrong way before realizing why everyone is waving and yelling.

Forget to put gas in your car—or charge it—and have it die on your way somewhere.

Leave something on top of your car and start driving.

Forget where you parked in a multi-story garage and spend 45 minutes wandering around and clicking your key fob.

Bonus if, after finding your car, you're so rattled that you scrape the car next to you while you pull out.

Turn an entire load of laundry bright pink by including a red sock or shirt.

Bonus if there's something important that belongs to someone else in that load.

Smell something horrible and find a bag of liquefied, rotten potatoes in the back of the cupboard.

Forget you're cooking something and burn it black. If possible, ruin the pot or pan too.

Have the toilet overflow all over the floor.

Break a window.

Get a notice from your landlord or the city about something you did or need to do. Noise complaint, clean up the yard, pull the weeds—whatever.

Have a check bounce or pay a bill late.

Forget an important birthday or anniversary.

Get an unfortunate haircut.

Wear mismatched shoes to something important.

Realize you had a gaping hole in your pants—or your skirt tucked into your underwear—when you get home at the end of the day, with no idea how long it was like that.

Pretend you know what other people are talking about because you didn't have time to watch the show, read the book, or keep up with the news.

Accidentally pocket-dial someone you really, really needed not to call.

Accidentally post something embarrassing online, or have something embarrassing about you posted online.

Burp, or have something else embarrassing happen, while you're giving a presentation or a talk.

Accidentally set off the smoke alarms at work.

Send a catastrophic reply-all email.

Cry at work.

Make a mistake that costs you or your company over $1,000.

Get fired or quit.

Switch majors or careers.

Spend a lot of money on something that turns out to be a major flop—a bad car purchase, a bad relationship, a bad degree, whatever.

Get asked when you'll get a real job, get married, or have a baby.

Now, if you want a printable list of all these memorable achievements, or want to start checking off your own, head over to DocRobbinSchool.com/30 to download a free copy. That's Doc Robbin School slash 30. Spelled out or the number both work.

Share this with everyone who needs to know that they are doing just fine. Let's reclaim the right to be a total hot mess while we're still figuring things out.

We need to stop setting people up to feel like failures for not achieving in their 20s things that most of us can't manage in a lifetime.

And thank you also to my sister Holly for reminiscing about what made our 20s a once-in-a-lifetime experience. Thankfully.